Am I Doing This Right?

Testing, testing, one, two.

Let me just start by admitting that I have no idea what I’m doing.

But look at me. I’m doing it anyways!

And lets all be very honest here, anyone reading this post is a close friend or family member (hi dad!) so I’m feeling a since of freedom to be a little imperfect.

To give you some background and some context: about a year ago, my husband kind of broke up with me – I say “kind of” because, oh my gosh, it is so much more complicated than that, as every marriage story is. But I’m keeping it simple here.

Here I was, separated, angry, lost, and unemployed. I had no idea where to go or what to do but I had to do something. I had so much restless and anxious energy, it had to go somewhere or I was going to loose my mind. So I picked up a shovel and started gardening. I obsessively weeded my landscaping. On my hands and knees with a hand trawl, I made myself new garden beds. I mowed the lawn, I weed waked. I did it all, man. When a branch fell off of a tree I kicked up the chainsaw and I chopped that sucker up.

Never in my life had I done things like this before. But I was all alone with limited funds and a lot of anger to work with. I had to call a friend to walk me though how to till a garden bed, I had to watch youtube videos on how to start up a lawn mower and don’t get me started on the chainsaw. That thing scared the bujesus out of me. But I did it. Despite my fear and my lack of knowledge, I did it all.

It was exhausting and I was being fueled by my anger so, honestly, it was draining too. But ultimately it was empowering. I figured out that I can take care of myself and I can take care of this house.

Fast forward to now, I’m honestly pretty happy. I’m figuring out my new place in the word. And I wanted to start writing about it. *Jump to me trying to take pictures for my first blog post:

I mean wow, the struggle is real! I’m going to be learning a lot as I go. I hope you join the fun. It’ll probably be a bumpy ride. But I can promise you one thing, I’m gonna keep it 100 the whole time.

Lets do this y’all!

4 thoughts on “Am I Doing This Right?

  1. Well I came across you on Instagram and followed the link to here 😊
    Is there a right or wrong way when you have dragged your arse from the turmoil you was in to this place where, with some guidance at times you are doing things by yourself!

    You’re learning to do the right things for you.
    Reclaiming your life and all that it entails.
    Keep on keeping on Lacy you are getting there every step of the way

    Like

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